I went to a pop-up wedding* this weekend, so let's take a thematically appropriate set of questions from thefridayfive archive:

1) Do you want to get married? Already did. We did everything backward--became friends first and then started dating, moved in together and then started thinking long-term, celebrated multiple anniversaries and then decided to have a big party.

I'm not sure I ever made a conscious decision about marriage, especially since it wasn't legal for same-sex couples at the beginning of our relationship. There was no big question about love and forever-ness, only a number of logistical hurdles to overcome. We got a domestic partnership certificate from my partner's work early on (specifically in order to get health insurance), another certificate a few years later from the town we lived in (also to support a health insurance application and, less crucially, to get a library card), and a marriage license from our state when it became legal there (largely to safeguard our meager assets for the other in case of disaster, since we have hostile families). (Coincidentally, that was on 09/09/09, nine years ago yesterday.) Finally, we had a party because the better half is the type of person who didn't want to miss the opportunity for a very large, very fun party with everyone she knows.

2) Where would you like to get married? As it turned out, we had the party in our backyard, the one and only time in my life I've lived somewhere with a backyard. (Very convenient.) We put up a white tent, rented some chairs and tables, got a local Chinese Malaysian restaurant to cater a banquet, and made a dozen cakes ourselves, the night beforehand.

3) If you were getting married in a week, who would be in your wedding party? Hm. The same folks who showed up and helped out eight years ago, probably. A few high school friends, a few college friends, and a few more recent friends. We have one very close friend in town right now--who's planning her own second marriage for next month, coincidentally--but by and large the people we each know are scattered across the country (and in some cases have moved abroad).

4) What would your wedding colours be? We used purple, because the purple-loving better half cared and I didn't.

5) Does marriage mean to you 'til death do us part?' Not necessarily. People grow apart. I'm doing everything I can to keep this relationship working, but I recognize that even the best intentions and hardest work can't always keep two people together forever.

* Pop-up: my term, not the couples'. The decision to marry was made on a Sunday, e-mail invites were mailed out on Monday, and the guests were instructed to bring potluck items. It took place on a Saturday morning in the couple's basement apartment (tidied up and decorated with flowers) and was over by noon. So lovely and so simple! It made me happy to see how happy they were.

How are you doing, flist? Want to share wedding fantasies or stories?

<b>1) Do you want to get married?</b>. <b>2) Where would you like to get married?</b> <b>3) If you were getting married in a week, who would be in your wedding party?</b> <b>4) What would your wedding colours be?</b> <b>5) Does marriage mean to you 'til death do us part?'</b>

The school year (and my commute) are starting again this week, so let's answer a relevant Friday Five from the archives this week:

1. What is your current main mode of transportation? e.g. car, bike, subway, walking etc.
Ideally, walking; I do as much in our neighborhood as I possibly can. But I take the bus to get downtown and the metro and the commuter rail to get to work.

2. Are you satisfied with your current main mode of transportation (answer to question 1)? Why? Yes! I love being able to walk. It's one of the joyous discoveries of adulthood, that you don't actually need to own a car. (Other joyous discoveries of adulthood: you don't actually need to live in a single family house, and you don't need to date men. :) We selected our apartment and neighborhood primarily for their proximity to grocery stores, transit, stores, and restaurants. And we've been especially lucky because the neighborhood's added quite a few options even in the time we've lived here.

3. Do you think you'll change your means of transit soon? e.g. buy a car, get rid of your car, walk more etc.? If so why?
One day I may decide I can't handle the mega-commute to Neighboring City to get to my job, and we'll move there--a move that will probably entail buying a car, since Neighboring City's not as walkable. But at the moment I'm happy where I am and feel as if the trade off (lots of things within walking distance and no need to own a car vs. long commute to work) are worth it.

4. If time distance and money were not factors how do you prefer to get from point A to point B?
Mm. That's a hard one. Ideally, Apparating? Bullet train? Given the current constraints of my Muggle life, I'd take a taxi more often to eliminate the frustrating metro portion of my commute. Or I might take a taxi at odd hours when the bus or metro headways are especially long. I have transit impatience.

5. What was your worst transit experience? Being in car accidents as a child, hands down. Nothing that's happened on bus, train, metro or plane ever since has been as destabilizing. (And I've never even been in a serious accident that left someone injured.)

How are you all doing, flist? Are you celebrating or mourning the end of summer?

Whoops! I somehow missed a week there. How have you all been?

* I'm just back from a long weekend in Denver, where my partner had some work meetings and I was able to catch up with my college roommate, whom I hadn't seen for an extended length of time since the 90s. I'd been thinking about her a lot recently because she was the one who convinced me to do a semester in London with her when we were in college and then pushed me to travel with her once we were there. We did so much on a modest budget: dozens of places in London, maybe six or eight overnight trips to locations in England, Scotland, and Ireland. I've often explained our slightly Odd Couple relationship by saying that she's both a homebody and a traveler like me, but before her I was really just a homebody; she's the one who showed me I could travel. We were both in London for a few days earlier this summer, and it was so good to share our love of the city and remember how we got started on this path.

* I've just finished my first babysitting gig with the sweet little ( bulldog ) we've been walking at noon on weekdays. His humans have arranged for housekeepers to come clean the apartment occasionally and wanted to know if we could take care of him in the apartment for an hour or so while the housekeepers were working. No problem! I said. But he really was a bit anxious, even after introducing him to our apartment several times last week. (We live two doors down, on the same hallway.) Pet aunt-ing is difficult! But he seemed to be fine in the end, after a lot of treats and lot of petting. Dogs aren't so different: new situations are stressful, and positive reinforcement, food, and lots of attention go a long way for both of us.

* I might buy a used Ikea Hemnes wardrobe from a neighbor tomorrow. Would this be too big in a medium-sized room? We have so few closets in this apartment I'm inclined to get it. Surely more storage space will help make the apartment more tidy?

* I have the end-of-the-summer blues. Only two more weeks before classes. I'm treasuring every last moment and writing like a madwoman. If any of you have ever lived on an academic schedule, you'll appreciate this cartoon:



( Friday five: On journaling )

* Last but not least: A very happy birthday to fandomer extraordinaire (and RL superwoman) alisanne! Here's a ( happy image ) to celebrate the day. (Source.)

We've been doing some dog-sitting and cat-sitting again, flist. They are darlings, all of them.

( Meet our four-legged clients. (Warning: large photos because I'm that besotted.) )

Every year I forget how quiet it gets on social media at this time of year. Happy mid-July, everyone!

In the past nine days, I've finished my last week of classes, attended final reviews, flown across the country, attended a wedding, finished grading, and closed the books on the semester. Whew! Too much going on. Haven't travelled home yet, so the excitement's not quite over, but things should be a lot more relaxed from here on out.

A tiny meme to keep up my weekly posting habit, courtesy of splix. Note that I'm staying in the playroom of an old high school friend's house about 3000 miles from home, which should spice things up a bit.

5 Things You’ll Find in My Bag: Swimsuit (overly optimistic; they haven't started cleaning the pool for the summer months yet), about sixty final essays from students (my bag weighs a ton), a mother's day card that need to be posted tomorrow if it has any chance of timeliness, a new book, and a light sweater (which hasn't been sufficient for the cool days in the Bay Area)

5 Things You’ll Find in My Room: An unused treadmill; NFL logo sheets; Star War plush toys, including a soft and squishy X-wing fighter; bunk beds; an unused big screen tv

5 of My Favorite Things [about California]: 99 Ranch Market, See's Candy, fake Spanish architecture, fresh and beautiful fruits and veggies, SUNSHINE!

5 Things I’m Currently Into: toy cars, board books, reading out loud (can you tell our friends have twin toddlers?), upscale strip malls, sitting around outside. ETA: Sandals! How could I forget about sandals?

5 Things On My To-Do List: Relax, relax, relax, relax, relax. And reply to last week's comments, posts, and e-mail.

How's your May been so far, flist? Want to play along? Text box below.

<b>5 Things You’ll Find in My Bag: </b> <b>5 Things You’ll Find in My Room: </b> <b>5 of My Favorite Things: </b> <b>5 Things I’m Currently Into: </b> <b>5 Things On My To-Do List:</b>

1. Do you suffer from Spring Fever?

Hm. Never heard it called that, but yes, I guess. The more light and the more warmth we get, the better I feel. (Psychologically--physically, I'm sneezing and rubbing my eyes.) Also, by about April I'm counting down the hours until the end of the semester.

2. Have you ever been twitterpated (infatuated or obsessed. In a state of nervous excitement)?

More or less constantly during my teens, and thank goodness that's over, let me tell you. It was all Too Much, those constant waves of emotion.

3. What does Spring taste like to you?

I think I mentioned my discounted after-Easter candy last week. Delicious!

4. When was the last time you visited an ice cream truck?

Decades ago. I'm not sure I've even seen one since the eighties. That said, food trucks are all the rage here, and although I don't visit as often as I'd like, I got some excellent bibimbap at The Green Bowl a few weeks ago. (I have never been to the other regular visitor, Kommie Pig, but the name always make me laugh-wince. First tragedy, then farce.)

5. Do you know what song your ice cream truck plays?

This sounds like the kind of childhood memory that should still be with me, but it's not. Advertising jingles, yes, TV theme songs, yes, even movie themes, but no ice cream truck melody.

Big thanks to write_out who plumbed thefridayfive for some questions from their archives. I'll put a textbox at the end if you'd like to play along. I'd love to read your replies!

1. Have you ever done something awful to your hair? What happened?

When I was about 12, my mother (who always wanted me better dressed and better made-up) bullied me into getting feathered bangs for a few years (bad 80s moment), but otherwise, I haven't ever done much with my hair. On a good day, my hair's clean and relatively tidy. I try not to have too many bad days.

2. Conversely, at what time in your life have you looked your best?

Summers! Because I'm warm and happy and (I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I do) not so pale. And days when I wear my favorite geometric pattern shirts. I really like geometric patterns.

3. Do you have a favorite article of clothing? Tell us what and why.

Many years ago I spent a magical day wandering around Providence, Rhode Island, buying Italian pastries and stopping in bookstores. Late in the day, books and pastries in hand, I ran across a yard sale and saw two long-sleeved men's athletic shirts, one grey, one sage green, with "Rhode Island School of Design" written across the front. They tickled my sense of humor, because RISD is an independent art and design school with no athletic program to speak of and relatively few gym bunnies, so who exactly was the intended market for these athletic shirts? Students' families, when they came to visit? But while I was looking at them and puzzling over this problem, the very friendly man running the yard sale came over and asked, "Do you want to buy them? Only fifty cents each." Who was I to say no to these quirky shirts that cost only a fraction of the price of a cannoli? I've had them for about fifteen years now, and they've kept me warm during during countless chilly runs and on many lazy Saturdays.

4. Confess the worst fashion trend you ever succumbed to.

I'm not very trendy, but I'm sure I've committed many terrible fashion missteps. Hm.... Aha! I had to wear a fancy dress to my brother's wedding (I'm not big on dresses) and so I turned to a friend for advice on the occasion. She approved my choice, but later when she saw photos of the wedding, she groaned. "Those shoes were totally inappropriate!" I looked. I'd been wearing the only pair of sandals I owned at the time, dug out of a box when I realized, on the morning of the wedding, I hadn't thought about what shoes to wear. "What should I have worn?" I asked. She told me. "So after spending all that money on a dress I was never going to wear again, I needed to spend more money on shoes I was never going to wear again?" "Exactly," she said. "I can't believe I needed to tell you that." "No one was looking at my feet," I said. She rolled her eyes.

5. Are there any clothing/fashion trends today that you simply don't understand?

I honestly don't know how jeans are supposed to work. (Or pants/trousers, for that matter, but mostly I wear jeans.) Nothing seems designed to fit actual bodies! I have several pairs, each of which fits me well in one specific way (long enough, wide enough at the hips, tight enough at the waist, generous enough in the thigh), but sadly none satisfies all the relevant criteria.

<b>1. Have you ever done something awful to your hair? What happened?</b> <b>2. Conversely, at what time in your life have you looked your best?</b> <b>3. Do you have a favorite article of clothing? Tell us what and why.</b> <b>4. Confess the worst fashion trend you ever succumbed to.</b> <b>5. Are there any clothing/fashion trends today that you simply don't understand?</b>

( Irish-related Five beneath the cut )

In other, non-Irish news, the last out-of-town guest of the spring break has now departed, and the regular work week is on the horizon. Big take-aways of this last visit? If you're mid-forties-ish and you've been keeping up with someone since college, you've actually known each other for longer than you hadn't known each other, and long enough to have forgotten entire episodes in your relationship. (Or maybe my memory's just getting worse very quickly, and folks are being polite with me.) Also, the Obamas are still the hottest ticket in town. We had to wait in line to see their portraits at the National Portrait Gallery.

Pulling up another Five from the thefridayfive archives this week...

( Friday Five asks the hard questions... )

Added bonus this week: Animals! Two videos that made me laugh out loud: happy dog with happy soundtrack and a cat watching a particularly stressful scene in a horror movie. Click though--you won't regret it.

Want to play along? Text box below!

<b>1. What is something amazing that has happened in the last five years?</b> <b>2. What is something you would love to happen in the next five years?</b> <b>3. Do you make "life plans" or do you live spontaneously?</b> <b>4. Do you think about what you might do when you retire?</b> <b>5. Is your lifestyle similar to your parents, grandparents, or something utterly different?</b>

Giving thefridayfive another try this week. Do you know, I had to look up "fate" and "karma" to answer these questions, that's how rarely I think about these things.

( On fate... )